The second start

Well, CT results are back and as expected, my literature results are a thoroughly sickening fiasco, reflecting the results of my two-year-long indulgence in Malaysia. Not only must I suffer a gap in knowledge wider than opposite cliffs of the grand canyon upon return to sec 4, my incompetence must also be prolonged into 2009; we'll see if I don't make a igonimious failure for my A levels - at any rate, I'm determined not to, hence no more slacking around and sleeping through lit lessons - I shall get right down to honing my skill and tactic, which, I'm sure, must be somewhere - I just hope it hasn't crawled away and died like some sort of useless dustball, in which case I'd still have to excavate it with a bulldozer if need be, because no way in heck am I gonna allow another doggone subpass to mar my report.

Chemistry lessons are by and large an amusingly bellyaching affair, what with our scrawny teacher, affectionately christianed 'Cheeks' by Virunardu, tottering around the science lab, blinking his eyes and lamenting over our student quality. Take this week's chem practical.

Cheeks (exclaiming to ZY) : Hey! You! I wrote your sister a letter of reccomendation to the college she was applying to. But for you, I'll make sure to write a letter of complaint!
ZY : But, sir!
Cheeks : 'Dear college! Please do not accept any letter of application from this student! No good will come to you and only harm will befall you!'
ZY : Hey!
Cheeks : Complaint number 1! Handwriting is too big!
ZY : No lor!
Cheeks : (Absolutely in his element, and therefore showing marked enthusiasm) Complaint number 2! Does not differentiate bench top from chair top!
ZY : (hardheadedly unrepented) But that's what you advised us to do!
Cheeks : I adviced some people to do it, not you, I was referring to those who are -
Hamtaro : Vertically challenged!
Cheeks : - Hey! That's mean and insulting! (Turns to Gilbeh) By the way, I saw your birthday ccard going around, and your friends are all signing it now. Don't expect too much, it's only handmade.
(Collective outcry of indignation from Chloe and I, referring to the comment about short people and handmade cards respectively.)
ZY : (looks at me in amazement later) He has a son! I can't believe he's still acting like this!

Boys (dogs) will be boys (dogs) even over biology MCQ marks.

Vic Dog : I didn't do that badly for bio! I got the same mark as you for the structured questions!
ZY : Wahaha come on! I totally owned you for MCQ
Vic Dog : (defensively) You think so?
ZY : Of course!
Vic Dog : Yeaj? What mark did you get? ( Looks ZY up and down, as though sizing him up )
ZY : (Returns the gesture by eyeing Vic Dog up and down) I got 19 marks. (Smirk).
Vic Dog : Wha-? 19? Really? ( Sizes ZY up again )
ZY : (smug smile) Yep. You?
Vic Dog : ... 15...
Elang : Dudes? Why the need to look each other up and down?
MJ : Sizing up something other than MCQ marks, of course!

Math tutorial today was no less wild, perhaps because MJ and I weren't sleeping as per usual; MJ was infact clutching my arm and squealing nonsense into my ear. LZY assumed his supposedly stern face.

ZY : (sounding remarkably like Mr Ngan) MJ, why are you being so distractive? Sit down!
MJ : THIS FROM SOMEONE WHO FALLS ASLEEP EVERY LESSON!
ZY : At least I'm not disturbing anyone. Be quiet and concentrate.
MJ : (laughs)
ZY : Shh!

Later, ZY is called to present his answers on board, which he does so with neither flair nor aplomb, but determination all the same to take up as much space as he can ( as usual ).

Me : Whoa, write bigger abit, bigger abit!
MJ : Yeah, abit small leh, we cannot see!
Vic Dog : Wow, look at him, just conquering all the territory!
MJ : Yep, he took up 4 fifths of the board and left that puny space for the other two answers and the teacher!
Elang : All the land just kena bomb by his writing! BAM BAM BAM!
MJ : Yeah, he's so possessive! VicDog, you better be careful not to mess with his things!
(time passes, and MJ notices the state of ZY's brackets on the board.)
Vic Dog : Why, do they look like phallic symbols?
MJ : Hm. Nah. Nobody has legs that stubby ( I shall upload a photo of the brackets as soon as I can find one)
Elang : (Starts guffawing uncontrollably into ZY's face.)
ZY : (gives us all a look of insufferably exasperation and intolerance. Assumes reprimanding tone and face) MJ, they are just brackets. For goodness' sake, what is wrong with you. Elang, stop laughing. (He take Elang's shoulders and turns him around completely so that Elang doesn't face him anymore. Elang is now laughing to MJ's face.)

Funnies from the LZY

1. "...Laser printers don't use ink! It just 'iiiiiiinnnnnggg' come out of the printer..."
2. (Typo on PW notes) "Zog Yi"
3. (From economics essay) "...in a large company, researchers feel like they are small dogs..."
[I'd love to comment on the sheer (unintentional) ingenuity of this statement, the fact that it implies so many things on so many levels, but wouldn't that take all the fun out of it! ]
4. "You should try combining names together, it's damn fun. Like for example, Chelsea and Wilnard will be Chelnard! Or maybe Wilsea. Or like, Emma and Wilnard - Emnard. Hahaha! Oh wait the best will be Peter and Bernard! Penard!"
5. Wilnard : I can't be going around holding a bow and arrow...people would arrest me for being a terrorist.
ZY : Nevermind, you can just say :"I am Wilbin Hood!" (Wilnard + Robin Hood)
6. "Gay dogu chou hentai! Tessa hoshi?" (Gay dog pervert. Wish for Tessa?)
7. (While in KL)
ZY : "I'll buy some muffins for Dogtor...you know, the kind that dogs wear on their feet..."
Me : "...huh? Muffins?"
ZY : "...Uhm...yeah...I can't remember the correct word."
Me : "Do you mean mittens?"
ZY : "oh! yes."